I found a job right after Uni but didn't know it was a scam
What if we unironically started using LinkedIn for desk flatlays and motivational quotes like it was 2012 Pinterest?
During what I believed were 360 days in Australia, I hoped to find a temporary job to put the working part of my working-holiday VISA to good use. As I wrote on the esoteric List Of Resolutions To Achieve Before Barbs Returns that my friends compiled, I resolved to find a job and look like a ‘serious’ person.
Coming up with a decent and exhaustive description of myself and my background for casual social interactions was hard enough. Never mind a description of what I knew, what I was willing to do and, sadly, what I did, for my resumé.
My resumé could fit on a sticky note. If it weren’t for my auntie’s magical herbal shop, it would have listed only a scam company I accidentally worked for.
Yep, that really happened. Welcome to Italy.
Yes, I did find a job immediately after Uni, but I didn’t know it was a fraud.
Sometimes, when I could shut the tiny voice comparing my life to that of strangers on the internet telling me I was behind in milestones, I almost thought adulting was not too bad. I lived in my family home but, hey, that meant zero expenses and plenty of time to chill. Every day felt like a Weekend and it felt good until I realised Mondays came only for people with jobs. And my friends had jobs.
I wanted to be able to travel around Europe to see my Erasmus friends so a part-time temporary contract work would have done the trick. Eventually, I stumbled upon a seemingly perfect job advertised in the newspaper.
The actual physical paper. I even circled it with a highlighter.
It was for a local consulting business. They were looking for young people and mentioned multiple opportunities within the business, including Human Resources. I felt like this was the first step in the right direction to achieve my dream job of working for Human Resources at a big bank.
I liked to call it a ‘dream job’ because, much like dreams, it made perfect sense in my all-theory-no-practice head yet it was based on sheer fantasies and could never happen in real life.
Not long after submitting my resumé, I got a call. The job interview happened on a Friday evening, at a bar. One coffee later, we shook hands sealing a 200-hour trial contract. I was expected at the office on Monday for the first day as a recruitment specialist with zero experience in the field, simply because I said that was the role I wanted.
I should have realised.
On the first day, I met one of the boss’ collaborators who trained me for one hour in the non-existent Human Resources and Recruitment department. He vaguely said that I had full control of everything, from advertising to recruitment, to establishing partnerships with Universities across the Nation. He showed me where the folder on the shelf was, sent me an Excel list and left. That was the last time I saw him.
I should have realised.
Before the end of the week, the boss accused me in front of the whole office of not making any sales. He shouted that he checked my phone call stats and knew I didn’t call anyone or signed up any new clients. I replied that my job was not making calls, but advertising internship opportunities for Uni students online and selecting candidates. The boss made an ugly face and went upstairs.
I should have realised.
The boss forgot to mention that ‘upstairs’ was his parents’ house, where he still lived, and the office was his uncle’s living room and if I got there before 9 I would see a middle-aged man in his underwear making coffee.
I should have realised.
I finished my trial period and didn’t receive my pay. The boss had plenty of excuses for not paying me the whopping 100 Euro he owed me. He claimed I didn’t work 200 hours, and had to continue working until I hired someone to replace me. I was tired of these schemes and the guy who trained me went missing, so I did not chase my lost pay. I added the working experience to my Curriculum Vitae and considered the contract fulfilled. At least I got something out of it.
I still did not realise!
Evidently, the boss forgot to pay everyone and declare the right income, as I learned from the finance police when they called me, enquiring about the company.
That’s when I realised.
Italy had betrayed me. It gave me a useless piece of paper, tricked me, chewed me up, and spat me out.
I thought that would be the worst career experience of my life. But when I worked as a congress hostess for a weekend, and a doctor attending the conference, after learning I just graduated, asked me about my job. Not the hostess one, of course. My real job. The one I studied for. I almost cried. At the end of the day, with thoughts of impending doom, I dragged myself to my car and found a fine on my windshield for the exact amount of money I earned that weekend.
And, of course, you remember the employment agency guy who recommended me to study German so that I could work in local hospitality during peak tourism season, right?
Everyone was welcome to join in the hit-drinking game of the year: Drink every time you don’t have a job. Double shot if you also don’t get any pay for the work you do.
But it was my University that broke my epistemological heart with a phone survey, right before I fled the Country:
“After you graduated have you applied for jobs?”
“Well, yes…”
“And have you participated in job interviews?”
“Yes, just one but…”
“And have you accepted one or more positions?”
“Yes, I had a few small jobs but…”
“In summary: within 12 months of receiving your degree, you have been selected for 1 to 5 job interviews and successfully recruited as a Philosophy graduate from Bologna University. Is that correct?”
“Technically yes but…”
“Do you agree for your results to be utilised as data for research and statistical purposes, and as advertising material by your Alma Mater?”
“No.”
We interrupt your regularly scheduled posting to acknowledge this is the 1st anniversary of Where are you from, and why? Yaaayyyy~
Involuntary jazz hands due to caffeine. And Melbourne has some good coffee!
I wanted to thank the 81 of you who subscribed to the blog, and the 200 who follow me via Notes! I’ve never done a shoutout like this. It feels weird if I compare this to other writers’ journeys, but then I imagine 281 people standing around my desk as I type and, let me say this, you are a great crowd! Some of you even became real-life connections via snail-mail1!
Welcome to the 10 readers who found me through recommendations, and special thanks to the 122 writers who recommended me! In case you missed the links on the right-hand side, I’ll list their blogs here:
Directly from the archives, please enjoy this authentic photographic evidence:
For those of you who have my current address, there is an unofficial cup-of-tea offer if you show up.
2 of those are bots but we don’t talk about them.
Congratulations on the anniversary!
PS: "2 of them are bots but we dont talk about that"😂😂
Wow what a crazy experience 😂 makes for a good story now 😜 No wonder you felt good riddance to Italy!!
Congrats on your one year anniversary!! I hope you continue writing!